You’ve probably heard it a thousand times: “A little spanking never hurt anyone.” Well, in 2025, that phrase sounds as outdated as bell-bottom jeans or a Nokia 3310 ringtone. So, is it still possible to be for spanking today?
Spoiler alert: no. And here’s why.
Why Spanking Is a Bad Idea Disguised as a Good One
1. Because Science Says It’s Ineffective (and Even Harmful)
For decades, people believed spanking was a valid way to discipline children. But serious research proves otherwise: not only does it fail to work, but it can also cause lasting harm.
- A meta-analysis covering 50 years of research (Gershoff & Grogan-Kaylor, 2016) found that spanking increases aggressive behavior in children.
- Neuroscience studies show that physical punishment alters brain development, particularly in areas responsible for stress regulation (McLaughlin et al., 2019).
- It damages the trust between parent and child, creating more fear than respect.
“Children learn more from how you handle your emotions than from your lectures on self-control.” – John Gottman
2. Because It Teaches the Wrong Lesson
A spanked child doesn’t think: “Hmm, I should really reconsider my life choices.” What they actually learn is:
- “The stronger person always wins.”
- “Violence is an acceptable way to handle frustration.”
- “Love and fear go hand in hand.”
If the goal is to teach, then it completely misses the mark.
“Children test limits, not to break them, but to make sure they exist.” – Daniel Siegel
What Works Instead?
Good news: there are discipline strategies that actually work—and they don’t come with emotional baggage.
1. Clear and Consistent Boundaries
Children don’t need spanking. They need clear, predictable rules. Discipline should be consistent and always explained.
Example: “We don’t hit others.” This isn’t a suggestion; it’s a rule. And it applies every single time.
Why it works: When a child knows what to expect, they feel secure and are less likely to test the limits.
2. Consequences Instead of Punishments
Punishing a child without context teaches them nothing. Logical consequences, on the other hand, are educational and help them connect actions with outcomes.
Example: “If you spill your drink on purpose, you help clean it up.”
Why it works: It teaches responsibility rather than fear.
3. Communication That Matches Their Development
A young child doesn’t have the same emotional regulation skills as an adult. Yelling at them is like asking someone to hold their breath while running a marathon—it just doesn’t work.
Example: “I see you’re angry. Let’s talk about it.”
Why it works: When children learn to verbalize their emotions, they gain better control over them.
In 2025, Defending Spanking Is Like Claiming the Earth Is Flat
Times change. We’ve learned smoking is dangerous, staying hydrated is a good idea, and spanking is both ineffective and harmful.
- The UN and the WHO recommend banning it.
- More than 60 countries have outlawed it.
- Every credible study agrees: it does more harm than good.
So no, in 2025, you really can’t be in favor of spanking. There are far better ways to raise well-rounded, emotionally secure children.
What about you? Did you grow up with spanking? Do you think it helped, or is it time to rethink it? Let’s talk in the comments!